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The joy of nature
On my early morning walk yesterday I passed a dead badger in the middle of the road and the decomposing, partially eaten corpse of a fox. This morning the badger's body had gone but that of the fox remained. I held my nose as I walked past it as it was likely to smell.
I visited the care home yesterday. My father was in his usual armchair. He got up and shuffled off to the loo. When he returned he looked at the cushion and remarked that there was some brown on it. 'What do you think that is?' I asked. He didn't reply.
I stood up to look, as did my mother. It was unlikely to be HP sauce or mud. I always inspect the chairs carefully before I sit down in the care home. My mother wiped the area with her hankie, a paper one, which she put on my father's discarded breakfast plate on the table. Unable to shift the brown (it had dried), she turned the cushion upside down. My father sat in the chair again.
Thought for today
A talkative bird will not build a nest.
West African proverb
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1.4.07 20:45
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A change of venue
The HN has finished replacing the single socket metal boxes with double ones, and has now turned his attention to the downstairs loo. He spotted an earth cable in there that runs on top of the skirting board and wants to move it behind the skirting board. He is like a dog with a bone with cables. If he sees one he wants to bury it.
I revised my list of colours. Ever since I chose the colours two weeks ago I have worried that I would regret my choice. I had chosen pale green for the hall and landing but am now tired of green; the hall is green already, a bilious green. It's time for a change. The colour I chose today is a pale beige.
The dead fox is slowly disappearing--flattened by cars and nibbled by creatures. Yuk.
Thought for today
To write one's memoirs is to speak ill of everybody except oneself.
Henri Philippe Petain (1856-1951)
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2.4.07 20:24
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A brief moment of peace
Went into town to dump more books on a charity shop and renew my library book, and had my hair cut on the way back. My having to shift books to move furniture for the p and d has made me less enthusiastic to keep some of them. When the house redecorating is finished I shall want to admire the walls and not conceal them behind bookcases.
I renewed my library book using the automatic machine all by myself. It was remarkably easy; I felt feeble at not wanting to use it before. Mind you, most things are easy when you know how.
I went into the hairdressers' on spec hoping they would not be busy and would be able to cut my hair. My luck was in. While I waited, seated in front of one of the mirrors because there was a large box on the seats in the waiting area, I looked at the staff's bulges and my wrinkles, at their chubby thighs and my scraggy neck.
Visits to the hairdresser are my half hour of exposure to fashion. Bellies are in, or out depending on how you look at them. There was a lot of naked flesh even though it was cold in the salon. Fashion must take priority over comfort.
I sat at the basin and the hairdresser asked if I'd like the neck press; at least that's what I thought she said. 'What's that?' I replied. She showed me a bar of grey polystyrene which she put over the basin edge to make it more comfortable. I wondered how many sweaty necks had rested on that, how many carbuncles had touched it. Fortunately, she put a towel round my neck so I doubt I came into contact with it. It reminded me of the cuffs for measuring blood pressure at work. They were rarely washed.
All that remains of the dead fox, apart from some fur stuck to the road, is an evil smell.
Thought for today
The only thing that stops God sending a second Flood is that the first one was useless.
Nicolas de Chamfort, Characters and Anecdotes, 1771
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3.4.07 19:40
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To swallow or not to swallow
The p and d arrived earlier today, before I had cleaned my teeth. I heard his van draw up, and hastily started to clean my teeth expecting him to sit in his van for a few minutes as he usually did. However, today he got out of his van as soon as he arrived and rang the doorbell while I had a mouthful of toothpaste. I should have spat it out straight away and cleaned my teeth later but, not wishing to waste it, (all the exhortations to recycle are making me obsessed with waste) I opened the door to let him in holding my toothbrush behind my back ready to resume cleaning. Unfortunately, he began to chat. I had a dilemma, to swallow the toothpaste or grunt replies. I chose the latter and hoped he could understand what I said. I had an uncomfortable few minutes all because I was reluctant to waste a gob of toothpaste.
Thought for today
Don't take life too seriously--you will never get out of it alive.
Elbert Hubbard, The Notebook, 1927
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4.4.07 21:09
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A knotty problem
The two back bedrooms have been finished and now the p and d has started on the front two. The finished bedrooms look good apart from the mess in them; they are each filled with the contents of two bedrooms. I am now paranoid about touching the walls and skirting boards in case I mark them.
Yesterday evening I thought I'd just hang up the curtains in the spare bedroom. What I expected would take me a few minutes took me two hours. The strands in the rufflet tape for bunching the curtains were not fastened at one end and so had pulled through. I decided to thread them along their channels bunching the curtains in the process. After much effort I managed to rethread the strands in one of the curtains and rehung the curtain. Having done this I realised that the strands had probably been pulled through deliberately; the curtain was now too short for the window and covered less than half of it. All that effort for nowt.
Not to be defeated, I thought I'd try to lengthen the strands with pieces of thin string. However, the thinnest string I found was too thick to pass along the channels for the strands as it was effectively double at the eye of the needle.
I had a rethink and tried a piece of plastic string that seemed thinner. This was also too thick. In the process of threading it onto the needle it had frayed so I pulled off about half and the plastic string then passed along the channels. Success.
My next hurdle was to attach the strands to the plastic string. Knots would be bulky and stick; binding the two together would be difficult and would give no guarantee of sliding in the channels. I decided to use knots; uneven bunching would be better than nothing. The knots I thought suitable were sheetbends; reef knots would slip. I searched for my copy of The SAS Survival Handbook (a book popular in the early 90s) which had a diagram of how to tie a sheetbend.
Could I follow the diagram and tie a sheetbend? No. I struggled. I went this way; I went that way. All I achieved were slip knots. Meanwhile the strands and plastic string frayed more and more.
Eventually, after much frustration, I managed to tie knots that didn't slip, though whether they were sheetbends is another
atter.
Thought for today
If at first you don't succeed, try, try, again. (Aargh)
English proverb
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6.4.07 20:22
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The joy of spring
The woods have come alive. Trees have a green glow. Footpaths have dried out. I went for a walk this afternoon and for the first time this year without a jacket, it was that warm.
This morning I took bedspreads and curtains to charity shops. There is still too much stuff in the house. I decided, as I trudged down the hill laden with bedding, that my sofa and armchair must go. There isn't enough space for them, and I don't like their colour (faecal brown). The next decision is how to dispose of them. They are still in good condition in spite of being 25 years old. (One careful, light-weight lady owner.)
Here's a snippet that made me chuckle. It's from this week's Hospital Doctor.
... the latest HSCA council meeting saw some pretty lively debate on the subjects of Modernising Medical Careers and the recent white paper on medical regulation. While all council members seemed pretty miffed with the Chief Medical Officer for England's ideas on regulation, some tried to say it was too late to do anything but try to improve the existing proposals. The debate reached a climax when one bellicose member, perceiving a timid response from his fellows, claimed that such actions were akin to 'polishing a turd'. There's a special white paper for that. It comes in rolls...
Thought for today
A house is the single biggest purchase that most of us will make during our lifetime ... yet most people will spend considerably longer choosing the destination for their next holiday than ensuring their family's most valuable asset, and their possessions, are adequately insured.
Hospital Doctor, 5 April 2007
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7.4.07 20:20
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Easter Sunday
The author of an article in yesterdays Times wrote that some (daft sounding) chap suggested that people could be happy if only they behaved more like dogs. What? I thought; crapping on pavements and sniffing other peoples bottoms. Count me out.
There was an article about a couple who had moved to the country. They had two children, a boy and a girl, called Song and Otter. Parents have a lot to answer for; how to blight your childrens lives from the day they are born.
Watched the second half of Persuasion which was shown on telly last week. There were a lot of gulps and looks and folk not saying what they ought to. Has life changed that much?
Have resumed walking through the woods in the early morning as it is now light enough to do so. Birds were singing loudly. Reminded me of committee meetings where some talk to the exclusion of others. The others get a word in only when the talkers pause for breath. Chairmen are often ineffectual, in my experience, and lack the firmness needed for efficient meetings with everyone being given time to speak, and the agenda completed. A benefit of retirement is that being on a committee is no longer obligatory.
Thought for today
The fundamental defect of fathers is that they want their children to be a credit to them.
Bertrand Russell
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8.4.07 09:30
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